The Midnight Rider (sabinelagrande) wrote in bizarrereviews,
The Midnight Rider
sabinelagrande
bizarrereviews

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Grr.


So, I've been writing Spike/Faye from Cowboy Bebop for 30_kisses, and posting them at ff.net as I go. In one piece, Faye's having a dream about Spike, and when she wakes up, it's revealed that she's actually in bed with Jet. Tricksy, I know. I'd like to point out that this was not the first other pairing I'd put in. Nobody batted an eye at the Spike/Faye/Julia scene, and while people did get pissed about the Spike/Julia, I was expecting it. But the chapter goes live, and I start getting all these "Ew, Jet!" reviews.

Along comes the 15th piece, and since I'd not done them yet, I put in author's notes. Included was this:

3a. I happen to like Jet/Faye, and I happen to think that Jet’s quite the sexy man. When you hate on Jet in reviews, it makes me not want to write. So no more hating on Jet. Yes, this is extortion.

I thought it was a rather gentle way to say "Shut up with the character bashing". So the next day, I get this review:

woah that was so SEXY gurl
BUT i can really reply to wat u typed...u like jetand ..."  "...im not gonna sa y nehting but damn...:coughing for alot of hrs:...
:finally stopped:...ok "ahem"..i just had to typed that...but squeeze-me?dang..ythast nasty im not like against u...but im against ur opion ...wait maybe that means...nevamind forgit...it there might just be fights...and i HATE when that happens but if it gots to happen...i would do that..so update soon gurl...


...

1. Is this English? If you think this is anywhere close to proper grammar or spelling, how did you even read my fic? Goddamn, I actually spend time writing, I check my grammar, I check my spelling carefully, I proofread. If I can do it for 4000 words, you can damn well do it for 30. (The commenter's profile says she's not a native English speaker, and I can't decide if that makes it better or so much worse.)
2. Yes, I know I committed the cardinal sin of actually liking the non-bishie. Shock, horror, dismay! Actually looking like a real man does not make one repulsive.
3. Every review from you calls my fic "SEXY". What in the shit does that even mean? For an extra bonus WTF, this chapter was nearly all action. What do you mean? Do I need to go and buy you some new adjectives?
4. My fic. My rule. STFU. I believe we've covered this. If this keeps going on, we're not going to have a fight. I'm just going to pull the fic, and you can all blow me. You're the ones that won't stop beating down my door for chapters. Trust me, I am petty enough to do this. It's not about you agreeing that I think a character's hot. It's about respecting my work enough not to bash the characters that I choose to use.

As the great man said, "Go away, kid, you bother me."
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